The Process of Becoming the Unwavering You (Your Best Self)
Most of us have some version of a dream life. A bigger home. A certain car. A job that actually excites us — or maybe just a slower, more intentional way of living. There’s usually a goal somewhere in there, and if there isn’t? That’s worth thinking about.
Here’s the thing though: life is a lot more flexible than we give it credit for. Hear me out. So many of the lives we admire are actually within reach. The difference is that they require consistency, hard work, and uncomfortable honesty with yourself. If you want to be a chef but you’ve never even learned how to cook an egg, there’s a gap there. At some point, the dreaming has to turn into doing.
I. Vision
So let’s start with the most important question: Who do you want to become?
Someone climbing the corporate ladder? A travel vlogger? The owner of a cozy little pet shop? One of our 5am Pilates girlies? Whatever it is — the first step is to give it shape even if it feels far away.
I’ll share mine. I want to help people build systems that actually change their lives. Eventually, I want my work here to become my full-time focus — more creative freedom, less corporate structure.
I’m grateful for my job but I also want a life that feels like it belongs to me.
So again — who are you becoming?
II. Identify the Gap
Once you have your vision, you have to get honest about the distance between that and your current habits.
Start asking yourself specific questions:
What does that version of me do on a normal day?
How do they start their mornings?
How do they spend their time?
Then compare that to your current habits and routines.
For me, I want slower mornings. I imagine waking up early enough to go for a walk, work on this space, and make myself a cappuccino before my workday even starts. Right now? That doesn’t always happen. So the gap is clear: more discipline and structure around my mornings.
Once you see the gap, the next step is breaking big goals into smaller ones. For example — if I want a homemade cappuccino every morning, that means I actually need to learn how to make one. I know, that sounds like such a tiny detail. This is exactly where people disconnect from their goals. The life you want is built from small, specific actions. You have to know what you’re working toward to actually get there.
III. Create Systems
This is the part that changes things.
I think of growth in five areas. You don’t have to use them exactly, but they give structure.
Foundation — Discipline & routines
Wellness — moving your body & food
Beauty — confidence & how you show up
Creativity — hobbies & curiosity
Becoming — mindset & personal evolution
It’s not about perfection in all five, but balance over time. Small effort in each area adds up faster than intense effort in just one.
IV. The Compounding Effect
Here’s something worth holding onto: small habits compound.
Take this example. Say your goal is to read 50 books in a year. That sounds a little intimidating at first...until you break it down:
50 books per year
~ 4 books per month
~ 1 book per week
~ 43 pages per day (for a 300-page book)
Now it’s just a daily habit. That’s the shift. Goals don’t change your life, systems do.
V. The Unwavering Mindset
To me, being unwavering means choosing long-term growth over short-term comfort.
It means staying resilient. It means continuing to pour into yourself even when progress feels invisible. Most importantly, it means recognizing that you actually deserve to build a life you actually want not one you just tolerate.
This is your life. So don’t just go through the motions — create the waves. Yes, some things will always be outside of our control. But we can control our actions, our effort, and the person we are becoming. That’s the whole point.
Becoming the Unwavering You
Write down:
Who is your future self? What does their life look like?
What are three habits they have? Think routines, mindset, lifestyle.
What is one small step you could take this week?
Big transformations rarely happen overnight. They happen through small actions, repeated consistently, over time. That’s what this space is about. Building systems that help you become someone you want to be. The unwavering version of you already exists in pieces. Your job is to build consistently.
