Creating Your Hair Routine

I’ll start with this: everyone’s hair is different.

What works for me probably isn’t going to work for you, and what works for you might not work for me. While the products may vary, the framework of a good haircare routine is pretty much the same for everyone: cleansing, conditioning, and styling. Everything else is just details.

Cleansing

The products and frequency might be different, but everyone needs to wash their hair.

I wash my hair once a week. My sister washes hers every day. Neither of us is wrong—it just depends on your hair type, lifestyle, and what works for you.

The important thing is keeping your scalp clean. Over time, products, oils, sweat, and buildup accumulate, and washing helps give your hair a fresh start.

If you have 3B hair like me, I personally use Shea Moisture shampoo because it’s sulfate-free.

Now, what are sulfates?

Sulfates are cleansing ingredients that do a great job removing dirt, oil, and product buildup. The downside is that they can also remove some of your natural oils, which can leave certain hair types feeling dry.

That’s why I don’t use sulfates most of the time.

You’ll also see a lot of shampoos advertising that they’re free of silicones. Just a little heads-up: shampoos typically don’t contain silicone anyway because that’s not really their job. That’s more for conditioner.

For me, Shea Moisture works most of the time, but every now and then I feel like I need a deeper cleanse. That’s when I’ll reach for Head & Shoulders or another clarifying shampoo.

The point here is simple: use what works for your hair. I’m just sharing what works for mine.

Conditioning

Conditioning is another essential step, no matter your hair type. Every head of hair needs hydration. This is also where you’ll hear people talking about silicones.

Silicones coat the hair strand, which can help smooth the hair, reduce frizz, and lock in moisture. Some people love them. Some people don’t.

Personally, I prefer silicone-free conditioners because my hair tends to get dry, and I like using oils as part of my routine. My hair responds better when I keep things lightweight and avoid too much buildup. Again, that’s just my preference—not a rule.

I use Shea Moisture conditioner here too.

Styling

This is where things really start to vary from person to person. I can tell you what I use, but your routine might look completely different. 

Since I have 3B curls, I usually use a styling cocktail of leave-in conditioner and mousse. Funny enough, when I was younger I used mousse all the time. In college I became a gel girl. Now I’m back to mousse again.

Hair is kind of a never-ending experiment. The biggest thing I want to emphasize here is to keep trying. Try different products and techniques. Pay attention to what your hair likes because when you look good, you feel good.

Confidence is built from a lot of little things. Having a hairstyle you love isn’t going to change your life overnight, but feeling put together can change how you show up in the world. When you show up confidently, you tend to go after bigger things.

That’s why it all connects.

If You Only Do One Thing…

Take the time to build a hair routine that works for your hair.